Cursing and Praying
by complexcase
Summary: ‘Wait!  Dad, no wait!  Don’t go.  You can’t just leave me with that, with th’She faltered again and brought her free hand up to cover her eyes.  He knew the look that would be there if he could see it.  He felt every ounce of pain radiating from her.'


_This is a one shot inspired by my watching Judas on a Pole AGAIN last night! I'm already in the process of writing my other fic 'The Girl in the Ditch' (shameless plug lol) but I wanted to try something a little heavier and I do love a BB hurt/comfort fic. :-) It was written very quickly so please let me know if it's any good or if I could rework it in any way. _

_Disclaimer: I don't own Bones, much as I would like to. _

* * *

He had gone to the Jeffersonian late that night to make sure that she went home to eat and sleep. He was even going to treat her to Thai food, being in a particularly generous mood after her findings had helped to solve a difficult case that day. He nearly succeeded too, but as she was leaving her desk the phone rang. Dammit. He told her to leave it, knowing full well that she wouldn't, and as she returned to answer it he followed and planted himself in the chair by her desk. Positioned directly in her line of vision, he waited and distracted her, making faces while she played along, laughingly speaking into the receiver, and flicking his hand away from her precious papers. 

'Brennan'.

Turning his attention to the skulls that were lined up along one edge of the desk he reached out to pick one up and received a sharp kick under the table. Drawing his hand back and muttering something under his breath he looked across at his partner to continue harassing her; she was definitely cute when she was pissed.

And then he saw it.

Her eyes stopped shining in a second and she froze, staring directly at him in disbelief before lowering her gaze.

'What? Wh-'

Unable to build a sentence with shaking words she instead let them tumble around her as she breathed deeply and briefly closed her eyes. He too was frozen in his seat, unable to hear the conversation but feeling every word that was uttered in her ear, breaking her piece by piece.

'Bones?'

Listening intently, she ignored him and tightened her already vice like grip on the receiver in her hand, then her eyes widened with sudden panic.

'Wait! Dad, no wait! Don't go. You can't just leave me with that, with th-'

She faltered again and brought her free hand up to cover her eyes. He knew the look that would be there if he could see it. He felt every ounce of pain radiating from her.

'Dad please!'

Nothing.

'Daddy…'

She whispered to no one, and brought the receiver back down hard, not caring if it landed on the hook or not. She sat still and he could see her mind working overtime, desperately trying to process the information she had just heard, fumbling and feeling its way through the fog that was fast clouding her judgement.

'Temperance'.

He already knew what had happened - he could feel it bursting out of her, could almost hear the _crack_ of her heart breaking, but still he hoped he was wrong.

_Please God don't let it be Russ_.

He didn't know how she would ever recover if they had gotten to her brother. Sure she was strong but how much hurt could one person handle? Her parents' disappearance had eaten away at her, made her feel abandoned and unwanted. She had made a life for herself, but then they'd found her mother's remains. And her world had once again crumbled as secrets were uncovered; still she had made it through. The revelation of her father's crimes, and the danger that she had suddenly found herself in from his enemies had shook her but she had accepted it. Resigned herself. At least her father and brother were still alive. If it was Russ this time…

'Temperance, what happened?'

He reached out to her hands, flattened against the hard wood of her desk and she looked up at him, unmoving, eyes shining in the gloom of the office, as a lone tear made its solitary journey down her pale cheek.

'Russ…'

She barely managed the smallest of words as her lips began to tremble uncontrollably and she pressed them together in an effort to regain control.

'He was killed today. Murde-'

Her breath caught and she looked panic-stricken at him, silently begging him to fix this, to make it all ok.

'Murdered'.

The word glued her throat shut and she gave up. Talking was useless, no words could ever convey what was coursing through her body at that moment. Her head sank down towards her chest, and he was out of his seat and round to her side in a second. As he placed his hand on her shoulder she flinched, and jerked herself up and out of the chair, turning away from him.

'Booth don't'.

He felt a sudden pang that she had rejected his offer of comfort but understood that she couldn't help it. Couldn't deal with anyone touching her as she stood in shock, disbelief, and anger, motionless in the darkened room. At a loss as to what to do with her hands she lifted them, then screwed them into fists, dropped them to her sides, and finally held them to her eyes, clenched shut. Every muscle was tensed; she couldn't decide what to do with her body. Whirling round quickly to face him again she caught his gaze for a split second, but dropped it as her vision blacked at the edges and the back of her neck tingled cold. One hand shot out to grab the desk, the other lay flat to her chest as she struggled to stand upright, to keep breathing, to slow her heart, and to think rationally all at the same time.

'Hey, Bones, sshh. It's alright. It's gonna be alright'.

He lied as he supported her, pressing her tightly into his large frame. Held her, rubbed her back and alternately cursed and prayed for her. Cursed her father for being so dangerously involved with these guys, cursed whoever murdered her brother, even cursed Russ for getting in the way. Cursed a world that could heap this much pain on one person, and prayed to its Creator to make things right. Enough now, she'd been through enough.

She shuddered and gasped, taking in huge breaths of air that never seemed to make it to her lungs, and she clung to him, her fingers clutching the folds of his jacket.

'Oh my God… Russ'.

Her legs finally gave out and she sank back into her chair. He lowered himself with her, keeping his arms strong as she stopped resisting tears and fell into him.

* * *

Sitting on the couch in her office she held her head in her hands, staring straight at the ground. He was seated on the coffee table facing her, hands on her knees, offering what little comfort he could, although he knew it was futile, knew that he wasn't reaching her through the shock. 

'My dad – didn't even – he just left. He said – he couldn't talk, it wasn't safe. He said he'd call – again, but I don't – I don't know'.

'Hey Bones, it'll be ok. We'll figure this out I promise - we'll find out what happened to your brother'.

'I can't do this Booth'.

He knew she couldn't, he saw it in her eyes as they glittered towards him, throwing out shards of her pain, of her fear, her despair. Slowly but surely she was losing the people she loved, and it was going to keep happening until she had no one. She knew it was irrational but she could see herself completely alone for life and it scared her now more than ever before. She had always thought that she didn't need anyone - that she could look after herself and deal with anything. There had been a time when she was adamant that she didn't need a brother who had abandoned her, but then he had come back, and he had brought her father back to her. And she had found herself trusting in him, though she didn't know why.

'I let myself get close to him again Booth… it was so stupid'

'No. Temperance, you're not -'

'Stupid. So _stupid'_.

She held her eyes shut tight and punched the couch, bringing her right fist down hard at her side. And again.

'Stupid. _Stupid_.'

He felt her tense and she punched again, this time bringing her fist hard into her stomach, relishing physical pain over the emotional hurt inside.

'Hey, stop it. Bones! Temperance. Take it easy, ok?'

He grabbed her angry arms and held them up, preventing her from hurting herself again. She stopped and leaned forwards into him resting exhausted on his chest, breathing deeply. And he held her. He held on so tightly and swore to God that he would never leave. That he would always be there for his partner, his best friend. She deserved to be able to trust at least one person in this world, and he was damned sure it was going to be him.

* * *

_Please read and review! Thank you kindly._

_tmprnc_


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